25 THINGS I KNOW FROM MY MOM
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
You better pray that will come out of the carpet.
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
Because I said so, that’s why.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
Shut your mouth and eat your supper.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
Stop acting like your father!
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
Just wait until we get home.
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
You are going to get it when you get home!
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?
20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.
When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
You’re just like your father.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!
:mrgreen:
At least your mummy told you one… heehe!
Haaha… hey Ian, long time no see. how are you?
If you want to have a better future for our children in Malaysia, do you part by signing the on-line petition at http://www.petitiononline.com/RCER2008/petition.html
This is one of the way (non-violence) to bring our message to the Government. Don’t just sit there, stand up and be counted!
Why do we need to reform the Election Commission?
1) Gerrymandering. The discrepancy between number of voters in voting areas is too great. The smallest parliamentary seat (Federal Territory, Putrajaya) has only 6,608 voters while the parliamentary seat for Kapar in Selangor has 112,224 voters. What this means is that one vote in the Putrajaya parliamentary constituency is equivalent to 17 votes in the Kapar constituency.
2) Phantom voters. A common tactic is to ‘buy’ the identity card of the voters. Party members from the ruling parties will then vote on the voters’ behalf. Random checking of a person’s identity must be conducted using those finger print checking device (like the bank use). Any voting done on another person’s identity must be made a serious offence under the election law.
3) Postal votes. The rules on postal voting must be reviewed, tightened and amended. The current rule favours the ruling party as the armed forces personnel and policemen who vote by ‘postal voting’ would obviously not jeopardize their career or promotion prospect by voting for the opposition. Voting under postal voting is not secret as it is under the watchful eyes of the senior officers.